My experiences in life and with Vippasana......

 

 

Questions that arose in the mind remained unanswered. What were these questions? Well let me try and articulate some of the questions :-

Q: What is the reason people go to temples so far away, stand in long serpentine lines for long hours, struggle and jostle in crowds just to look for one second at a diety's idol? Temples are meant to give you peace of mind and harmony, and I always landed up feeling insecure and unsafe standing in between huge crowds and being pushed constantly. Once my 2 year old son was about to be crushed and I had to put him on my shoulders. I always felt why have I come here? Belief and faith is a very good thing and definitely shapes the mind. But I somehow never developed this belief and faith.
 

Q: Why is a woman who is undergoing her monthly periods not allowed to undertake any activity related to prayer of enter inside a temple?.... A woman's body has a natural mechanism of shedding the unimpregnated mass of flesh which would have otherwise formed a womb for a child. Why is that considered impure.. isnt it a biological process of creation by which all of us were born in this world? In olden days, there wasnt a concept of sanitary napkins and bleeding could become visible, so that could have been a a reason for women having periods to be isolated in their houses. Some people explain that it is because women are not supposed to exert themselves on these days as they are bleeding. In olden days, all work at home used to be done manually by the women and this was a way of  giving them rest. Is it applicable today in a world where women are on the helm of affairs in the corporate world, in sports, arts etc.? What happens when there are important conferences, sports matches, tournaments, cultural programs etc. during those days? Do women cancel it because they have bleeding? Then why even today, women are not allowed to enter temples on the days of periods?

Q: What is the meaning of the sankrit verses that are recited at each function by the great priests and why is it necessary to do all the "hawans" and elaborate rites and rituals in today's world of technology and convenience? ... I have tried asking many priests, and rarely one or two could even just explain the process and its significance. Of late there are a lot of books available on the internet on Vedanta philosophy which does give some plausible explanation of all the rites and rituals that have been passed down from generation to generation. What is amiss that we do not achieve what was supposed to be achieved by doing these rites. The realisation in the person's  mind of sacrifice and developing an attitude of sacrifice is the main idea behind most "yajnas" and "homams". But how many of us truly practice this in our daily life?

These questions and many other such related to religion were always  troubling my mind because there was no logic in what was being told to follow blindly. Being an engineer only furthered my inquisition into the logic of things and if I didnt get the apt answer, the practice was ceased forthwith. This kind of attitude was not taken nicely by the elders and they were hurt, as they have been following everything taught by their parents. But could I suppress my inquisitive nature to question and believe in what I sincerely feel is right.  What is it that I felt was right? Well, one principle learnt by me in my life , thanks to the tough training I got in my teens is that " Mind is the most powerful organ in our body, in fact mind controls the body." I knew this in a very superficial way by self experience. I could never run as a child. When I joined training, the first week we were taken for a run by our seniors .. I had to run 14 kms... I had not run more than 1 km in my life and I used to get sick quite often.. I contributed a lot to the pharmaceutical industry in my childhood. I used to live on antibiotics till I was in school. Once I joined training, for three and a half years of my cadets training, I never got fever even once. Why? Because the mind was occupied trying to survive in the new menacing environment and get used to the new way of life. It was an incredible transformation. I became much stronger, determined and developed tremendous will power to do things which others would consider difficult or even impossible. Thus I evolved from a boy to a fully grown man. Well, I thought so, but did I really grow up? I enjoyed myself thoroughly with all pleasures of life at the young aghe, namely biking, drinking, smoking, girlfriends etc. etc. Being a bachelor and staying in Colaba in Mumbai was a great opportunity to enjoy all these things. In fact , I stayed in Cochin, Visakhapatnam, and Mumbai in my bachelor days serving on board ships and submarines and in every place had my full share of enjoyment. Time flew very fast and soon it was time to settle down in life, and so at the ripe age of 27 yrs I got married with a beautiful girl.( It was an arranged marriage).

 I became a family man, married with a beautiful wife and two kids and continued to live life with the theory of keeping your mind strong and facing life bravely. There were many ups and downs and my wife used to tell me at times that I  am too insecure and self oriented. I never believed her and chided her saying that it was my expereince and I know what to do in different situations because of my experience. Whenever we go out for any movie or function, I used to be insecure about reaching early and getting the tickets or good seats etc. When I drove, I used to try and show my skills in reaching faster and always used to feel that no one can drive better than me. These were the result of  experiences and evolution of the mind by experiences in this huge bad world.  Whenever I used to teach my child and he did not understand a very basic principle in any subject, I couldn't control myself and used to shout at him since I had already explained it thrice to him and still he looked blank.Till I reached the age of 36, life went on and all the questions in my mind remained unanswered and I did not have the time or inclination to introspect or seek answers.

 I started introspection in 2008 when I joined an "Art of Living " class. In that they asked me  " Who are you?" and everytime I answered something they again aksed the same question. Well it was aimed at making me see the truth but I could never understand a thing. And then there again I saw "blind belief" in people getting fruits, flowers and sweets for a great living person. While I enjoyed the "Sudarshan kriya" a breathing technique taught by them, the concept of diefying a living person was against my principles. I started running marathons at this time and I found my mind getting calmer as I ran.

In 2011, I joined  a "Sahaj Yoga" camp and here I realised something great. When I was meditating, I felt some sensations on the top of my head and I  learnt about the chakras in our body. But the questions were still unanswered. In 2012, one of my dear friends and colleague, Krishnan told me about this 10 days course called Vippasana. I just listened, not attentively as I thought it to be another similar course  where I would not be able to achieve anything. But as time flew, I do not know what happened , but I decided in 2012 to try this thing out. So I enrolled for the course online as it was being conducted at Mumbai where I was living  and  I just needed to take 10 days leave.  Thus my journey into the "Valley of Answers" started.

Vippasana was an eye opener. It was an amazing , out of life experience for me. It was as if the locked door of knowledge was opened. While I write this I would confess that to put my thoughts on paper will not be easy and may not be understood by many, because Vippasana is not something that can be spoken and heard and understood. It is about experiencing it by each person for himself/ herself and developing an understanding on their own. The teachers only teach the method of practice and once you start practicing it and you understand the concept, life changes totally. Mind settles down, world becomes a beautiful place, you start relating to all natural things around yourself and start understanding reality. All my questions have started getting answered now. I have realised the futility of so many practices and habits that I had been following from childhood. It is all about the mind - body interaction and how the ego and habits cloud a human beings mind and do not allow him/ her to observe reality.  Again, for  a person not into spirituality, these words may seem to be heavy and unrealistic, that is why I had clarified earlier that this is an experiential thing which cannot be explained in words and understood by listening or seeing others.

I had never read our scriptures namely "Vedas". "Bhagwad Gita" etc. earlier. However, after doing Vippasana, I started reading the "Bhagwad Gita" and all that is written there and what I experienced started to match and correlate beautifully. This was a magical thing for me. I started joining the dots. I joined Bhagwad Gita sessions and discussed Vippasana with quite a few people. I found that most  people with whom I spoke, seemed to be really interested in listening to me and when I started telling them about Vippasana and the knowledge that I had gained, I went on for 1 -2 hours and they were all ears. This was true with my friends, my aunt etc. but not with my parents and some other people. I tried to  talk to them, but they used to feel and tell me that what I was doing and practicing is not possible by all and it is very difficult for a normal person to practice all this. Initially, because of my ego, I started arguing with them, and then when I introspected by doing Vippasana, and understood my mistake. I am supposed to be equanimous in all situations, so I needed to accept the reality. This is experiential learning and their mind was not yet ready to experience this. So I stopped arguing and just followed my practice regularly. Every person has to realise it for himself and only when he/ she will have  a desire to seek knowledge about self, have questions to be answered will the doors of knowledge open. In this fast paced world, not many have the luxury of spending time with themselves, so it is a difficult proposition.

Bhagwad Gita understood by me after Vippasana was an amazing experience. It is a great book to have and read daily as every time you read it, new depth of understanding happens. The best part is that now, it is no longer about " Krishna" and "Arjuna" but  "Self" and "consciousness" and therefore the logical answers that I was searching for are all available and as it gets deeper and deeper with more practice, more clarity starts coming on the answers. Unknowingly, attitudes and habit patterns in life have also changed for the better. My wife says that I am no longer insecure and take things calmly and have completely stopped shouting at children when I teach them. ( earlier, I used to get worked up if they don't understand after two-three times of explanations). When I shout at them sternly , I do it with a calm mind with an aim to stop them from doing wrong. The state of mind is the most important thing and learning to accept yourself and the weaknesses after observing them is the key to conquering those very weaknesses. That is how nature is, the more you accept it after observation, the weakness starts reducing on its own. This is a beautiful game of your mind and thoughts and Vippasana is a methodology to play this game and learn as you play.

Chapter 4- The Way of Knowledge

Chapter 4 - The Way of Knowledge

This chapter has 42 verses divided into seven main areas which are as described below:-
(a) The Tradition of Jnana Yoga
(b) The theory of Avatars
(c) The Desireless nature of God's work
(d) Action without Attachment Does not lead to Bondage
(e) Action and Inaction
(f) Sacrifice and its symbolic value
(g) Wisdom and Work

(a) The Tradition of Jnana Yoga. (Verse 1- Verse 4).The first three verses are an introduction given by the Lord  to the tradition of this Yoga which has been passed down generation after generation ( Vivaswan-> Manu-> Iksvaku) but has got lost to the world by lapse of ages. This yoga is a very old form of yoga which is being taught again to Arjuna by Lord Krishna. Lord Krishna is the symbol of the deep consciousness( conscience) within all of us and Arjuna is symbolic of a normal human being. In this entire scripture, we can understand the deep meaning of all the verses when we realise this truth and then observe the meaning of each verse. What is being essentially described is the tradition of "Jnana Yoga", which is the art of  performing certain actions towards seeking knowledge of the actual truth. This truth and path to the truth was discovered long long ago by great scientists of the internal being, whom we respect as  the great sages/ seers. Krishna is only trying to rekindle the lost  art / technique in the mind of Arjuna. Since Arjuna is ignorant and clouded by different feelings at this point of time expresses a doubt in verse 4 that how can Krishna know about this as Vivaswan was born much earlier than Krishna.  This question or doubt of Arjuna takes us to the next section of the chapter -"The theory of Avatars".

(b) The Theory of Avatars. ( Verse 5- Verse 12). Verse 5 talks about the various lives that Krishna has had which he knows about but Arjuna  knows not. Verse 6 brings out the knowledge of the self that is not this physical form or body which is only a carrier of this divine self. The self is the consciousness existing in different life forms which are an outcome of the force of Prakriti( nature). This verse has a very deep meaning and needs more explanation. Life forms manifest due to "maya" which is basically a collection of "karmas" , i.e. the habits formed due to actions of living beings being forced upon them by the five senses.  Based on the accumulation of these habit patterns and karmas, life forms evolve with varying levels of energised "self consciousness". Krishna is a fully conscious self which implies a completely enlightened living being who has achieved ultimate knowledge and truth and therefore can pass on this knowledge to other beings at lower levels of self consciousness. Avatars are basically some individuals who are at much higher levels/ highest level of self consciousness who are the trail blazers for the normal human being. Verses 7 and 8 bring out the essence of the balance in the universe to ensure that the levels of dharma and adharma are balanced by having some trail blazers like Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Jesus, Prophet Mohammed, Guru Nanak etc. who try to teach people to realise the ultimate truth. These people are the so called "avatars". The word "dharma" is emphasised here, which essentially means the "right" way of life. The trail blazers help people to understand the essence of dharma by becoming one of them and then facing difficulties and doubts, come out of the problems and lead as an example to be followed by others. The demons destroyed are these doubts and difficulties faced in life. Verse 9 brings out the fact that he who realises the absolute truth and achieves enlightenment, is released from the cycle of births and deaths. Verse 10 explains that this is achieved by getting rid of passion, fear and anger and when the person is totally absorbed in the self to observe the ultimate truth. Wisdom reveals itself only then and thus enlightenment is achieved. Verse 11 explains that once a person decides to become a seeker and commits to the process, the self or the divine accepts them and shows the path to them. In this process, even if the person seeks for material benefits with a true commitment, even that is achieved. Verse 12 elaborates this fact. Here devatas and Gods are all actually the one and only eternal truth and universal self which is omnipresent and existent in all living beings. A takeaway here is that if a person sincerely devotes and thinks of achieving something in this world, it is obtained easily. This is the secret of the universe and nature. However, such desires and achievements will not take a person to see the absolute truth. This takes us to the next section.

(c) The Desireless nature of God's Work.    (Verse 13-Verse 22) : Verse 13 talks about the four castes in the caste system. The specific terms used are "guna" and "karma" , which means that the castes were created based on the aptitude ('guna') and function ('karma') and not birth. This fourfold order was designed for human evolution and conduct was the only determining feature of caste. The present system of defining castes by birth is against the whole fundamental knowledge of BhagwadGita.  Verse 14 talks about not having any desires of the fruits of labour/work and therefore there is no bondage of work. Verse 15 says that in former times, men used to do work in the true spirit without thinking of the results for themselves and thus not having any bondage with the work. All work was directed towards improvement of the world. Verse 16 and 17 brings out a question of the difference between "action" and "inaction" and how to differentiate between the two and also try and identify a wrong action. Verse 18 explains the concept of seeing action in inaction, meaning that inaction describes a method of doing work without any attachment to the desires that are there in our mind. Inaction does not mean refraining from action but refraining from any action that is resulting from attachment to our own desires. Inaction here also means selfless and desire-less action. Turning away from action and calling it renunciation is actually an action performed by fools and ignorant people. Sitting down quietly and meditating is an action as you are doing an action to quieten your mind and body. This does not imply that one should abstain from performing his/her duties, in fact, all duties and responsibilities are to be performed without any desire for result for self. Verse 19 describes a Buddha as a person who has freedom from selfish desire and has an outlook based out of wisdom. Verse 20 explains that such a Buddha abandons the attachment to the fruit of work and works without any kind of dependence. Verse 21 is about the nature of work done by a Buddha who having no desires, with the heart and self under control, giving up all possessions, performs work for the maintenance of the body and therefore does no wrong. Verse 22 explains the concept of equanimous state of mind in pleasure and pain, in success and failure, freedom from jealousy and satisfaction with whatever is the result.

(d) Sacrifice and Its Symbolic value.   (Verse 23-Verse 32):Verses 23 - Verse 30 bring out the essence of sacrifice and its symbolic value. It is explained that any work performed as a sacrifice which here essentially means "self-control" especially of sense objects. An apt example in practical life would be when we feel very hungry/ desirous whenever we see/ smell any of our "favourite" dish. Even when someone speaks about it, a desire arises to have it as if it is there in front of us. Similarly when we do not get the deserved promotion, we get this feeling of anger and jealousy on the others who have been luckier. These are all sense objects and the context of sacrifice here is to give up on the reaction to these stimuli. When we offer food and articles to God during a yajna, it is symbolic of sacrificing something that you deeply desire. The concept of sacrificing breath by restraining the breath is explained in verse 29. Actually, observing one’s sensations in times of stimuli from external sources such as described above is very difficult, so the breath is used as a medium to observe. Actually, the body is giving signals all the time with the breath, moment a desire/ anger/ jealousy/ greed/ anxiety arises, the breath changes and if one is observant on the breath( inhalation & exhalation), the pace would change drastically. So restraining this change in breath would also be a sacrifice as it may suppress the feeling that is trying to evoke a reaction. Verse 31 brings out the importance of sacrifice by stating that one must eat only the remnants of food after the sacrifice to attain the insights of the enlightened one, basically the verse is trying to bring out that the intention of sacrifice in human being ensures that one gives first and then only has anything for himself/ herself. Any such human being who follows this strictly in life is sure to attain enlightenment very soon. Verse 32 explains that there are various means of sacrifice and all/ any of these would enable human beings to reach the state of enlightenment.

(e) Wisdom and Work . (Verse 33- Verse 42): Knowledge as a sacrifice is superior to any material sacrifice. What is essentially meant here is that the yearning to gain knowledge by reasoning and inquiry is critical and important. Accepting something blindly is not knowledge, inquiry and satisfying the reasoning by own intellect is the first step towards gaining knowledge. One must seek a teacher and then inquire and read and reason for oneself with own intellect to develop an understanding and personal knowledge. But that alone is not sufficient, as the next step the person has to tread the path of  introspection inwards and experience the knowledge and realize the spirit which would lead to wisdom. Reading Scriptures- Pranipata Sravana, Intellectual Reasoning- Pariprasna-Manana; Realization by meditation and service- Seva-Nididhyasana are the three steps described for gaining knowledge and wisdom. In other words, faith comes first, then Knowledge and then experience leads to wisdom. When one follows this path, the sense of difference is destroyed and actions do not bind. Nature is great and does not differentiate, any one who starts following this path starts getting immediate results, even if a thousand sins were committed earlier by the person. Verse 37 amplifies this by saying that the fire of wisdom burns to ashes all work which includes any crime/ sin that has been committed by the person or any binding work which was done for selfish motives. Verse 38 brings out the purity of the wisdom and states that one who practices this path finds the purity for himself/ herself in due course of time. Verse 39-42 emphasises on the importance of faith in terms of the commitment required and the hard work needed to be put in to subdue one's senses to gain wisdom. Once the wisdom is gained, supreme peace is attained. Sense data and logical inferences will only lead to doubts and scepticism whereas unwavering faith and actions of sacrifice and service and efforts in introspection and learning about the inner aspects of life would lead one to wisdom and supreme peace.Verse 41 states that a doubting person or a person with wavering faith will never be able to reach the sate of supreme peace and therefore is on a path of degradation and will be clouded by ignorance as life passes, this cloud will keep becoming thicker and thicker and eventually lead to misery and unhappiness. Therefore the path described above needs to be followed by one and all with complete faith and devotion and commitment of consistent practice of sacrifice and service to attain the supreme state of peace and move upwards in this path of life.